A Mother's Utopia

Well, what are you, I mean what AM I going to do about it???  Fuck if I know... In all seriousness, I know I need a game plan because I don't want to slip back into an oasis of darkness.  Been there, done that and honey I don't want to go back.  I was laying in bed last night and the wee hours of the morning and bright and early this morning, I haven't gotten much sleep since moving out of my 3rd husband's house and back to my hometown, but that's a post for another time, and I realized I am so short and snippy with my children.  I don't do it intentionally but I do it a lot, I was even that way with him (3rd husband).  Where did my patience, compassion, and ability to enjoy the moments go?  Should anyone find them, please send them back to me!  I don't want my children to remember me as their cranky, short-fused Momma but the woman who loved them unconditionally and would walk to the ends of the earth for them.  I most absolutely woul...

Perspective -  a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view. It's been a while and after talking with my daughter I remembered this place... a place for my thoughts and feeling to be put someplace other than inside my head.  Sadly, I see that not much has changed.  I thought I had changed my perspective on life and how things happen to pertain to me and how I react to them, but alas they have not!  When does the cycle end, when does it stop.  When do the bouts of depression and sadness dissipate?  I have worked long and hard to become the woman I am, the mother I am, the friend and coworker/employee I am.  Yes, I have moved up in the workforce and yes I have found my voice to stand up for myself but why the continuing depression in my life?    I would love to say it ends here!  To take a stand and say NO MORE, but it is not that easy.  LIFE, LIFE is so unkind and trying.  I grab the small tr...